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My Beloved BILLY

by Evie Fisher.........................................

September 21, 2008 was a not so typical Sunday for me. I woke up at 7:30 in the a.m. and I didn't feel real good. Couldn't put my finger on anything so I just got up, took my shower and decide to go to Dunkin Donuts and get a dozen donuts and take it to my work place, where I happen to be the Wellness Director. God has away of directing your steps and this morning was no different, for you see this was a new job for me and i was living alone in a motel as I had found the "perfect apartment" yet. So here I am with my employees eating donuts like its going out of style when my phone rand. I lokked at the caller ID and it was my son , Billy. I answered with 'a your up early'. Billy was not there instead it was his girl friend Kelly screaming at the top of her lungs, and I couldn't make out what she was saying. I thought she and Billy were fighting so Im screaming put him on the phone and she kept saying he won't come to the phone. I thought did he hit her surely not as i have never known him to hit anyone, but she kept screaming and I kept screaming put him on the phone. I couldn't understand one word she was saying until finally she said I can't put him on the phone he is not breathing. Thats when I collapsed. I said Kelly is my boy dead, is someone working on him and she said yes, they were but she didn't know if he was dead. But I knew, in my heart I had lost my beautiful child. One of my employees put me in a wheel chair and wheeled me to my car and drove me from Atlanta to Albany where my son had just moved to 8 months prior. My preciuos son was an executive with Citi as aDistrict Manager over 6-7 offices in the southern/eastern region of Georgia. Billy. was 13 days out from having his 36th birthday. My only child. Billy was a good little boy and an awesome grown man,he was kind, loving and generous to a fault. He never met a bum he didn't like and would give money to. He had a heart for everyone and had the capacity to love the unloveable. He had an amazing people I.Q. He believed in helping everyone that needed it and was a good friend to everyone he met. He was in a position of power but he never used it to beat people up with it, but to elevate those he worked with, to excellence. He was very funny and had a great sense of humor, he knew how to lighten up tense situations and was always the life of every gathering. Billy was honorable and honest and lived his life with great integrity. He loved his country, his friends, his joband girlfriend but above all he loved God and me, his heartbroken mother. My beloved Billy died in his sleep. He was an organ donor and was still able to donate bone and tissue, plus his beautiful blue eyes. 20 people were helped thru his generousity. My son had the biggest funeral I have ever seen or attended. People from all over this country came and cried and paid their last respects. The flowers were too numerous to count and the cards came in for months. I love and miss my child and will forever be devastated. The best part of me died that miserable day.The bible says that 'to be absent from the body is to be present with God' Well my child is in a good place, but has left a hugh whole in my heart, that can never be filled. I can only sit and wait to join my son and spend eternity with him. I go everyday to the cemetary and I sit in a chair next to his tomb. I decorate his tomb every holiday or event because as a mother thats all I can do for him now and talk to him. I tell over and over again how much I love him and miss him. I will be having my first Mothers Day and I still have alot of first to go through and I dread them all. I di not celebrate in Thanksgiving or Christmas or New Years but I did spend them with him for hours at his tomb. I wished I could breath life into him and bring him back but I can't and he probably wouldn't come back. I always said the Greatest gift from God for a parent is to die before your children and I do believe that whole heartedly. So for now all I can say to my beautiful son is 'REST IN PEACE MY SWEET PRINCE UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN'. I LOVE AND MISS YOU BILLY. LOVE MOM

Comments would be appreciated by the author, Evie Fisher

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